Medieval gallstone remedies

I've got a great RSS feed from Medieval Cookery waaaay down on the left column here on my site that I like to read through every now and then. Not that I'm really all that good of a cook, or that I would ever attempt some of the remedies, but some of this stuff is just fascinating.

Browsing the recent entry of The commonplace book of Countess Katherine Seymour Hertford (1567) showed a few interesting gallstone treatments:

A medycyn for the Stone

Tak the cromes of levyned brede
and frye theme wt butter and vyngne
then putt them into a bagge and then
aplye the same unto the naked belly
the sycke lying in his bed one his bake

So in my humble attempts to translate, take the tops (crowns?) of leavened bread, fry them in butter and vinegar, put into a bag (cloth I would assume) and apply to the belly while the patient is lying on his back. I wonder if the mixture should be hot or cold when applied?

Then there's this one:

horehonde
sampier
hawberries or
haw flowers
beane coddes
maidon leeke
puleol montaine
Aventes
Saxifrage
Ramsons.

A presyouse water to breake the Stone

Distel a pint of the water of
everie of these by them selves and
put to them a gallon and a pynt
of good malmesei / that the malmesei
mai be equall in quantitie wth
the other waters then put therto
two ounces of ginger beaten into
fyne powder and Dystill al together
in a limbecke and the firste stillinge
as longe as it will burne well in
a spone kepe it bi it selfe and the
Last by it selfe.

I recognize horehound, saxifrage and ginger but the rest of the ingredients baffle me. So I guess you distill the first list of ingredients together, but then you add a gallon and a pint of 'malmesei'. Now I'm not a certified linguist, but doesn't the the word 'mal' mean 'bad'? Maybe it means that it tastes bad. Anyway, two ounces of powdered ginger, ok, but what's a limbecke? A quick online search proves that translates to 'vessel'. Then distill. I think. The rest completely loses me. Something about burning it in a spoon. Was this medieval crack or something?

Now here's one that might just work:

A Drinke to clense the gall & lykewise the lyver & the Splene

Take Docke roote the reddest you can gett
washe them & Bruise them and so put them
into Ale wth a Sponefull of Annys seede
ffennell roote and one Parcelye roote : pycke
out the pythe of them and so lett yt woorcke
wth new east and when yt is stale Drincke
yt evening and morning one draught &
sometymes in the daye when you have lyss to
drincke

Dock root is a mild laxative. Anise seeds and fennel would sure improve the flavor, but would also have a calming effect on an irritated stomach. Parsley is still used today as a gallstone treatment by herbalists and nutritionists. So I should find red dock root, wash and bruise them, put them in ale (hey, that's never a bad ingredient!) with a spoonful of anise seeds, a fennel root and a parsley root. Ummm. Pick out the pith of them? Then let it work with the yeast (from the ale I assume) and when it is stale drink it morning and night. Drink also during the day if you haven't drunk much else. I think this results in a slightly licorice flavored stale beer. Mmmm...medieval medicine.

The rest of this manuscript (sadly it IS only text - I'd love to see the original pages) has remedies for everything to warts, pimples, bloody flux, and the ever-present medieval malady 'evils in the head.'

Had I lived in this time period, I'm guessing that one would have been forced upon me quite a lot. No, I probably would have been uppity enough to get burned at the stake or something. That'll cure you of ALL your ills right quick!

Winter Fireflies

Winter is knocking on my door. My prediction of the first snow of the year was only off by two days. I really don't like winter, but it's much nicer to spend it in this area than where I used to live, in New England. On the plus side, it gives me an excuse to wear my Jayne hat.

Speaking of Firefly, there's been a huge growth in fans lately, which of course, translates to more websites and cool Firefly and Serenity things that can be found online. Oh, and Serenity also WON A HUGO AWARD on Saturday, August 26 at LA Con IV, the 64th World Science Fiction Convention. Here's the video of Morena Baccarin accepting the award, reading Joss Whedon's acceptance speech (PG -13 if you are worried about swear words).

Well, I had intended to embed THAT video into this post, but since that feature was disabled by the owner of the clip, I'm going to have to give you this one instead. Also because Nathan Fillion just asked me to 'please put this on the internet'. It's Joss Whedon and about half the Serenity cast at a stop on the Wizard World tour.



WOW- is this ever cool! Create your own Serenity ship from paper! The instructions are in Portuguese (I think), but the diagrams are good enough to figure out what you should be doing with all those pieces. You'll need a color printer, sharp scissors, glue and lots and lots of free time.

If you happen to be a PodCast junkie, you'll love The Signal and FireFlyTalk, two podcasts devoted to news of the 'verse. On both sites, you can click to listen now or dowload them for later.

If you'd rather listen to music, try some Filk. Oh, you thought that particular brand of songwriting was native only to the SCA? The Bedlam Bards, normally known for their Renaissance Fair performances are Browncoats!! They've written a filk of "Hero of Canton" and called it "The Creator of Firefly - the man they call Joss!" clicking this link opens an mp3 postcard, where you can get a FREE download of the song!

And FireFly Filk is a site with lyrics to many, many more great songs, but you'll have to do your own singin'.

I haven't figured out how to do a link into Second Life yet, but there's a a bunch of new Firefly/Serenity things going on in that virtual universe as well. Why, just the other day, I was able to walk through TWO different full size Serenity ships. You can now buy avatars that look like any of the cast, and there's a group of people trying to create a whole 'verse themed SIM.

All I can say is, you KNOW you've achieved cult status when people create a cookbook based on your story. Big Damn Chefs is about to publish The International Browncoat Charity Cookbook. Their collection of recipes submitted by fans from all over the world is huge. MMMM.... Livin' Legend Eggs, Special Hell Chili, Fruity Oaty Bars.... I'm gettin' hungry...

SCA in the News

I've gotten all backed up with things to write about! So I'll try to keep it short...

In about a week and a half I'll be traveling to San Francisco (Kingdom of the West) for five days. Sadly, this conflicts with 20th Year, which I really, really wanted to go to. The most Outlandish party of the year and I will not be there.

Ah, well. Weddings are important, too.

Another event I will miss is Rogue Camp, which ironically, would have fallen on the same weekend as 20th Year. But I can understand how they might not want to throw a 4 day party for 50 friends, being new parents and all.

I just feel like I haven't gotten my recommended yearly dosage of camping events, and I'm surly about it. Maybe there's a few coming up that aren't too far to drive for a weekend.

Lately I've noticed the SCA making the rounds of online news stories:

Mancos, Renaissance style
July 10, 2006 By Thomas Munro | Herald Staff Writer

A man in a sashed white tunic tramps through the thoroughfare of matted straw, bellowing a voluble proclamation toward silk-draped tents and women at spinning wheels.

"My lords and ladies, oyez, oyez, oyez! A white Chevy Blazer needs to be moved immediately!" (read more here)


Another take on the same faire can be found at Cortez Journal Online.

Ooohh, this one's in the OUTLANDS:

Superday gets medieval touch
Middle Ages and Renaissance relived for Cheyenne audience
By Becky Orr
Published in the Wyoming Tribune-Eagle CHEYENNE

The decision would be an easy one for Deb Hammons. If she could exchange the 21st century for medieval times, she said she would do it.

"It would be one of those dreams come true," she said Saturday at Lions Park.

"Put me in the time machine." (read more here)

Life in the Medieval world; Society for Creative Anachronisms (SCA) brings Middle Ages and Renaissance to reality
by John Groth of the Jackson County Chronicle

Mark Hoelscher wanted some friends. Instead, he wound up with a family.

Ten months ago, the 27-year-old Hoelscher arrived home from being overseas with the military. His wife had moved out from their home in St. Cloud, Minn., while he was gone. He didn't know anyone. However, as Hoelscher began adjusting to the real world, more problems mounted. He started experiencing post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and having problems relating to people, especially civilians, because he had had been around military personnel for so long. He didn't know where to turn - or who he could turn to... (read more here)


Mmmmmm. All this reading is making me hungry.

I think I'll make a Medieval Castle Cake and lay seige to it.

Outlandish White Scarf Recipe

Take one pound of a$$-kicking, and mix in five pounds of humility. Add a cup of leadership, and a pinch of sass. Slowly add a bit of decorum to taste. Bake as long as necessary to rise to the occasion.

During the baking process, dress the White Scarf with lace, ribbons and all manner of finery, just to prove you can. But we all know it’s what’s on the inside that counts, so make sure that it does not become “overdone’’.

The best icing in the world doesn’t help a tasteless cake.

Poke with an epee several thousand times in the midsection to determine if it is cooked thoroughly before serving up to the public.

Remember, a little blood adds flavor, and is good for keeping the bitter taste of pride down.

Best Japanese food in the world

Normally I don't go all crazy for Japanese food. My good friend Ian had told me about Domo in Denver a couple of times, and we got the chance to go a few days ago for Badger Blades end-of-faire-dinner.

Holy wasabi. Jesus H. Christ. For once, I was speechless. As I walked through the gardens and admired the koi, I thought "wow, it's like I'm actually IN Japan." Then we went into the small museum, which has many items like World War II sake cups and uniforms that have been donated to Domo. Also in the museum is a sliding wall that allows you a great view into the Aikido dojo, where we watched students get hurled to the floor over and over. Worked up my appetite.

I ordered the Wanko-sushi, which at first seems really complicated, but it turned out fine. I was really quiet through dinner, which usually means I'm either totally pissed off, or totally enjoying the food.

Seriously, this is on my list of "things to do in Denver when you've got company you want to impress."

Arigato...

Return of the King Extended DVD

My friend who works at Blockbuster got an advance copy of the Extended edition DVD "Return of the King", and I must say I'm pretty impressed with all the extra scenes. They certainly fill in some of the story I thought was 'hurried through' in the theater version.

Another fun thing is the 'easter egg' scene which is a faked interview with Elijah Woods. Only he doesn't know it's fake. Gotta love those saucy Germans.

We only made it through the first disk of the movie, and haven't touched any of the other special features yet.

I'm going to have a LOTR party sometime this spring, and we'll watch all three extended versions in a row, back to back. Then for those who can make it all the way through, we'll watch all three easter eggs. We've decided to serve mead, Hobbity food and make a version of lembas bread out of cornbread and honey.